When Your Dream Job Becomes Draining

This year I turned 28 and lost my grandpa. These two events were a significant game-changer for me. I also began to crave stability, which really is something difficult to have as a freelance stylist. Many people experience going through a career rut, but I don’t think it’s a normalized conversation amongst fashion creatives. So many of us feel like we’re obligated to create because we are doing what we love. There’s a sense of ungratefulness for expecting more out of your job because not many people can pursue their creative endeavors for a living. But I’m here to tell you that it’s okay to not feel drained.

Credit: Photo by Liza Summer from Pexels

In middle and high school, I realized that I wanted to work in fashion. But I didn’t know exactly what I wanted to do in the industry. After high school, I decided to try my hand in makeup artistry, that didn’t work. Shortly after, I study fashion marketing at the now-defunct Art Institute of Hollywood. When I wasn’t studying, I spent most of my time watching reality shows like Project Runway, Kell on Earth, and most importantly, the Rachel Zoe Project. Long story short, I became engrossed with the world of fashion and celebrity styling. I finally had found my calling, fashion styling. But getting my start in the industry was a lot harder than I expected. I remember interviewing for intern positions with several established stylists and pr showrooms to no avail. Eventually, I got tired of being rejected and decided to take matters into my own hands. In the spring of 2013, I reached out to a local photographer and model paid them to help me get my portfolio started. My first shoot was not Vogue material, but it was good enough to allow me to begin my first portfolio and network with other up-and-coming fashion creatives. Since, I’ve gone on to be apart of some really amazing projects. I barged my way into the industry, and I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished. I don’t need to feel guilty for being in a rut.

Me on set adjusting a model’s wardrobe.

Being a stylist has by far been an amazing job and experience for me. I have learned so much and met so many amazing people in the industry.
I can’t imagine myself doing anything else. Still, I have definitely considered what I want my future to look like. It’s definitely given me a chance to start pursuing my love for fashion history. As of now, I’m not leaving styling, but instead, I’m exploring my options and creating new career goals.

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